It's Almost Here!

This week, I feel like a runner. I feel like one of those people I've always wanted to be. One of those people who gets up early in the morning, leaves the house when it's dark, and runs while most other people are sleeping.

I have LOVED my running this week. I still feel daunted by the mileage. Sometimes, I wake up in the morning and panic a little bit when I think about the fact that I have to run 3 miles or so. That probably seems crazy, and once I do it, I realize it's not bad, but I still wake up and panic. I know the more mileage I get under my belt, the less I will feel this way. I'm just trying to achieve some consistent mileage this week so that I'm confident going into next week---it's marathon training time!!! It's almost here.

My invaluable reference book, Non-Runner's Marathon Trainer, is designed so that each chapter corresponds to a week of marathon training--from Week 1 to Week 16. The introductory chapter is the one that discusses the "preliminary training" that I've been doing for the past 3+ months. It feels great to know that starting next week, I can "officially" read the book, chapter by chapter, to correspond to my mileage and while I have most of the pages of the book memorized, I can review the content on a chapter by chapter basis and make sure I've really incorporated all of the "mental toughness" aspects that I will need for marathon day!


It's hard to believe I've made it through all of the preliminary training. It's hard to beleve all the weeks that have passed. So little and yet so much has changed.


What HASN'T changed:


My body. Not to beat the issue into the ground, but my body really hasn't changed. I keep waiting to at least feel like my LEGS look stronger, but honestly, they look the same. I look at them, and I KNOW they are stronger but they look the same as my lazy legs did before.


Bella's enthusiasm. I still get every bit as choked up each time Bella bounds toward the front door ready for her run. Her excitement for her training is so inspiring for me.


My resolve. My resolve to run a marathon. I still want it real bad.


My Diet Coke Habit. No doubt about the fact that I've been drinking less, but I still drink too much. At this point, I think ANY is too much ,so I feel the same guilt about ANY as I did about the A LOT before. By and large, I don't drink it in the morning. I ALWAYS have it at lunch. And these days when I drink it, I think about how soon my next run is and whether or not it will be affected. It's a work in progress.



What HAS changed:


My bedtime. I crash out about 8:30pm on the days that I've run. I'm the least socially stimulating companion in the evenings because after a long day of work and a run, I'm dead tired.


My anxiety level. When I run, I feel calm. Even when I feel stressed during the day, it's a different stressed. Like a stress ontop of a baseline of calm. It's kinda cool.


My body. As much as I complain about it not LOOKING different, my body IS different. My knees are stronger. Things that use to make them sore, I can now do without noticing a problem. When I go to yoga, it is no longer the hardest thing I have ever done to make it through a class. I get way less cardiovascularly tired which is AWESOME because then I just get to enjoy the stretching aspect of yoga.


The weather. It's finally cooling off. Yesterday morning when I was putting on my running shoes in the back yard, there was a breeze, and it was notably cool. I thought about the fact that as it gets cooler, I'm going to have to figure out what clothes to run in.


The Planning. Planning for how every aspect of my life is going to fit around my running schedule--from social obligations to trips to alcohol consumption to sleep. When I make plans, currently my running is the first think I think of. I think about running ALL of the time.

The Eleusiveness. I use to always feel like running was something I couldn't do. As I've described previously, I'd hear about people running and be in total awe. I couldn't relate to what they were able to do, no matter how much I admired it. The other day, I heard a patient talking with one of my co-workers about how she runs 10-20 miles a week. Before, I would have been in awe of this feat. This time, I just thought . . . . Me too!


I RUN. Oh, and I run now, not woggle.